Week 14 Early Games: Mazel Tov!

Week 14 – Early Games

Minnesota (10-2) -2.5 @ CAROLINA (8-4)

Carolina is getting a lot of love this week, but we don’t see it. Maybe I’m just blinded by my hatred of Cam Newton but Carolina did not look good last week in New Orleans. On the other side, Minnesota did just enough to beat the Falcons in Atlanta.

Minnesota is well coached and so deep that they should control this game. This should be a close game, but we expect Minnesota to finish a sweep of the NFC South with a 3-point win.

PICK: Minnesota -2.5

KANSAS CITY (6-6) -4.5 vs. Oakland (6-6)

Kansas City’s offense finally hit its grove last week. Alex Smith was fantastic and Tyrek Hill and Travis Kelce made big plays. The only problem, they scored too quickly. This led to KC’s defense spending too much time on the field and the Jets made them pay.

Adding to KC’s defensive woes, the team suspended its best defensive back Marcus Peters for throwing a late flag into the stands. Sure, it was a stupid penalty to take, but it was one of the funniest plays of the week and it made the day for these three Orthodox Jets fans. Please promise us that the flag gets used to wrap the glass at all of your weddings.

Mazel tov!

Mazel tov!

Oakland has been bad this year and they have no business being 6-6 and tied for the lead in the AFC West. Last week, the Raiders got the gift of multiple Geno Smith turnovers to beat the Giants in a game that was much closer than the final score. If Alex Smith plays like he did last week and early this season, Oakland won’t get any gifts from its defense. We expect a shoot-out as both defenses suck. KC’s weapons are too good and they’ll get the win and the cover.


Dallas (6-6) -4.5 @ NY GIANTS (2-10)

The Giants fans are all set to love up on some Eli this weekend. So get out your #10 jersey and get ready for Eli to pull a horseshoe out of his ass one more time, Now, when you yell at the TV when Eli spikes it at the ground, you'll do it knowing how much he means to you.

We have 4 words to advice, and it's not "Take the home dog." That actually is our advice, but it wasn't the 4 words we meant.  We have 4 other words of advice, for Eli. So 8 words of advice, but still 4 for you. And 4 for Eli. There's probably 4 more words for us, like "take a writing class". So 12 words. But we're sticking with 8. You take the points, and Eli, remember we told you:




CINCINNATI (5-7) -6.5 vs. Chicago (3-9)

Cincinnati is coming off a very tough, physical game against Pittsburgh. On short rest and after blowing a 17-0 lead, it will be very hard for Cincinnati to recover. They will probably do just enough to hang on and win this game, but it won’t be by more than a FG.

Cincinnati will be without Vontaze Burfict who is out with a concussion following a Hines Ward type blindside block by JuJu Smith-Schuster. In 2004, this hit would have made NFL Primetime’s highlights with Tom Jackson yelling – “He got jacked up”. In 2017, it earned JuJu Smith-Schuster a 1 game suspension. Ironically, Burfict is one of the dirtiest players in the league and he got knocked out by someone names JuJu. Cincy is also missing Joe Mixon and Dre Kirkpatrick both out with concussions.

Screen Shot 2017-12-10 at 10.40.31 AM.png

This spread is too high given the situation.  Take the Bears and the 6.5.

PICK: Chicago +6.5

Detroit (6-6) -0.5 @ TAMPA BAY (4-8)

Detroit QB Matt Stafford injured his throwing hand last week but will play. But Stafford throws into tight windows with so much speed and accuracy that this hand injury will mess with his velocity and timing. Look for multiple interceptions from Stafford. Not to be outdone, Jameis Winston will also throw multiple interceptions because he’s Jameis Winston.  

Historically, Detroit fades at the end of the season so we be doing just that. Fade the Lions and take Tampa at home in this toss up game.


Green Bay (6-6) -3.5 @ CLEVELAND (0-12)

Cleveland fired its GM this week and hired a new one later the same day. It was a pretty baller move as they stole the Giants top candidate before he even had the chance to interview with the team next Tuesday. Maybe the notoriously conservative Giants will learn that they need to move a lot quicker in 2017. Former Browns GM Sashi Brown did a great job drafting depth and accumulating picks. But missing out on multiple franchise QBs was a big problem that cost him his job. With Josh Gordon back and a new regime in place, the Browns look like they may have made moves to turn the corner in 2018.  Too bad they decided to keep Head Coach Hue Jackson.

This game comes down to who will throw more INTs – Brett Hundley or Kiser So-so. We think Hundley wins a close one 3-2 allowing the Browns one extra possession to win the game. Browns will win this one straight out so we absolutely love getting 3.5 points at home.


HOUSTON (4-8) -2.5 vs. San Francisco (2-10)

Jimmy G. (much easier than spelling out Garoppolo) looked great last week in Chicago. Unfortunately, the 49ers couldn’t get the ball in the end zone and had to settle for 5 FGs. Good thing they were playing the Bears, as those 15 points were enough to steal a win.

This week, we expect a lot more from Jimmy G. as he is going up against a Houston defense that has been allowing some big plays. And with Tom Savage’s propensity to turn the ball over, expect the 49ers to have plenty of chances to score. Now with Jimmy G at the helm, the 49ers rebuild has been accelerated. They will win this game making it two in a row and will finish the season very strong.

 PICK: San Francisco +2.5

BUFFALO (6-6) -6.5 vs. Indianapolis (3-9)

Not much to say about this game. Buffalo’s run defense has been horrendous as of late and they are starting J. Peterman at QB. Hopefully, Peterman will not deliver another Urban Sombrero (5 INTs in 1 half) and going against Indy’s terrible D should help restore some of his confidence.

Urban Sombrero.png

Indy has been playing games close and should be able to keep this one within 3.  We still don’t understand how anyone can justify making Buffalo a 6.5-point favorite even if it’s 20 degrees and snowing. Take the Colts and the points.

PICK: Indianapolis +6.5